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Relationships are essential to life as no man is an island. This is why we have to be careful of the various relationships we involve ourselves in because they can make or destroy us. Your life is not a game and you should never gamble with it. Godly relationships are best for us as they would always make us better people and affect us positively. You should always pay attention to the relationships you keep because they are pointers to where you are headed in life. Here are 7 signs to help you recognize an ungodly relationship

1.They pull you away from your relationship with God
Those we build our lives around, the people who are closest to us, are the ones who can either help bring us close to God, or pull us farther away. When a relationship begins to pull you away from God, then there are danger signs all over it. God is supposed to be at the core of every relationship. Now, when you have someone pulling you away from God just know that the person is not of God. The bible says in Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” If your identity is in Christ alone, then your life will automatically come into conflict with your non-believing friend. Also the bible says in John 15:5 “I am the vine, and you are the branches. If you remain in me, and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me, you can do nothing. So you have to do all you can to remain in Christ as this is where your life can always be fruitful

2. Your identity is lost in that relationship : 

How to know if your identity is lost in a relationship is another blog post on its own but here are some ways

You’ve lost touch with your goals, life’s purpose, passion and aspirations
You are always afraid in the relationship
You can barely recognize yourself
You no longer consider and speak about your wants and desires
You are always seeking for approval
No matter the relationship you are in you always have to be yourself because that is when you can fulfill your life’s purpose.

3. You have to compromise to be in the relationship : 

When you have to compromise on your core values as a child of God, just know that you are on the wrong track. Our relationships are supposed to enhance our lives and not draw us back spiritually. Why this happens most of the times is because the other party in the relationship does not have the same set of values with you. Even the bible says in Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed? To sustain this kind relationship, you will always have to compromise and this is not healthy for your life at all. If you are currently experiencing this in any of your relationships, please stop ignoring it. Do something about it


4. They don’t have a relationship with God : 

When a person does not have a relationship with God, it shows in the words that come out of their mouth, their actions and inactions. Having a relationship with such person would definitely pull you away from God because your foundations, beliefs and values are not the same which would always have a negative effect. If you understand who you are in Christ, you will not involve yourself with such persons as this would always pull you back spiritually and otherwise. Sometimes such relationships can prevent you from doing what you know to be God’s will for your life. Spending time with non-believers and their influence can make it hard to do God’s will, cloud your vision for victory, and even drain you of your desire to live for God. Here’s what the bible says about such persons in 2 Corinthians 6:14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what [a]fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?

Everything seems rushed in the relationship
When you are in a relationship that the person seems to rush things, then there is pending doom because a lot of things are swept under the carpet, major decisions are made in a hurry, your opinion does not even matter sometimes and you don’t have room to think things through or pray about it. You just can’t seem to catch your breath in this relationship because of the constant urgency and it is draining you. This is an accident waiting to happen. Such a relationship is highly dangerous and this is not a sign that should be ignored at all. It is time for you to re-evaluate yourself and this relationship.

 5. You have no peace about being in the relationship : 

You feel uneasy about the relationship and you are not sure why. You keep having the feeling that something is not right even though you can’t place your hands around it. Sometimes you doubt your decision of agreeing to be with that person and this makes you uncomfortable when in their presence. You’re constantly on edge, or worried about the relationship. Even your family and friends are worried about you. The bible says in Proverbs 10:22 “The blessing of the Lord, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow with it”. I also believe that your loss of peace in that relationship could be a pointer to it not being God’s will for you. If you are feeling this way, take out time and pray about and let God guide you.

6. Family, friends, and spiritual leaders warn you of the dangers of the relationship : If the people that are closest to you and love you the most are worried about the person you’re in a relationship with, it should cause you to think twice. And if they love you enough to be completely honest and tell you the truth, sharing their worries or advise against the relationship you really need to pay attention; they may be seeing something that you’re not. The bible says in Proverbs 37:30 that “The godly offer good counsel; they teach right from wrong.” The godly people in your life who voice some red flags about your relationship are valid voices. Listen to them.

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